Yes, it's true. I'm a tragic, opinionated lip balm snob. In the midst of this whole "greening my existence" process it has surfaced a lot. Those who have renounced plastic (I greatly respect you, but can't join you quite yet...) will scoff at this and whip out a homemade recipe and a nifty keepsake tin/jar...but as I stated before I have lip balm issues! To start with--I have to have my lip balm in a tube. I have tried the cute little pots of lip balm numerous times in the past and found that I abhor the feeling of the lip balm on my fingers. Even if I wipe it off...it bugs me. My second issue is the feel of the lip balm. It cannot be too waxy nor can it be too greasy/slippery/melty. My third issue is scent/flavor. I do not like mint, vanilla, chocolate, cinnamon, some fruit scents (fake watermelon scent makes me gag, strawberry makes me hungry) or honey. And sometimes the "unscented" is actually not unscented but smells like chemicals/sunscreens which is icky. Oh! I guess I have a fourth issue as well...medicated lip balms...I don't like my lips to feel "tingly"...so camphor and menthol are out. AND--I need to have SPF in my lip balm because skin cancer is yucky. Whoops, I almost forgot! I don't like to have dye in my lip balm either...although Bonne Bell Lip Smackers Dr. Pepper is sheer heaven to my sense of smell...I can't get past the dye and the thought of ingesting it...(shiver). OK, I think that covers my requirements...let's take a 5 minute break, stretch our legs and get a drink of water before we resume--Oh sorry! I prattled on so long I thought I was at a seminar or something...
So I'm probably sounding a bit high-maintenance right now...I'm not...really...don't judge me! :) Anyways...what does that leave me with? I had previously settled on Chapstick Moisturising (in the royal blue tube...which is very different than the other Chapsticks, believe me!). However, I don't like the idea that it is petroleum based. If the bizarre "fact" floating around the internet is true, that most women ingest around 7 tubes of lip balm/lipstick in their lifetime...that is pretty darn gross. You might as well just pop open a quart of oil right now and chug it! Eeeew...that gave me the shivers just typing it...but I digress. What options are left for a sustainably-minded lip balm freak like me? After MUCH searching and TONS of trial and error I have fallen head over heals for: Kiss My Face Sliced Peach flavor and Un-petroleum Cherry flavor...which shockingly enough actually smells like real cherries not fake cherries (the Tangerine flavor isn't bad either). Yes, it is true these are encased by plastic tubes...but I'm taking baby steps here, remember? I'll tackle the plastic battle another day(year)...
If you made it through this whole post you deserve a gold star, blue ribbon, treat, whatever...so I'm including a link to the Lip Balm Anonymous website. The site is meant to be farcical...just an FYI...I don't want anyone spilling their guts in an emotional confession only to be laughed at and scarred for eternity...
http://www.kevdo.com/lipbalm/
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